opening doors.Now, around 3am if you are in my house you will hear the pitter patter of her feet running down the hall and her sweet face will appear next to my bed.
"Mama?"
I gently scoop her in my arms and snuggle her between Jason and I.
She says "I happy", cups my face in her hands and kisses me.
Me: "I happy too... sweet dreams my little one."
Yes, I'm prepared for the judgement of other moms. (I have my armor on)
(your child should not sleep in your bed, they should sleep in your bed, etc)
My theory on raising your children: There's no right or wrong way. It's whatever works. Take bits and pieces from those that love you and that you trust and find your own way. Whatever works in your life. We are all so different, God made us this way for a reason.
I don't want my little angel to feel unnecessary fear.
Fear of the night, fear of the unknown or fear of "tigers". Which is what she is afraid of.
At this point I control a majority of what she is exposed to and in these early precious years I can protect her from the fear of darkness and snuggle with her for a few hours.
Yes I do experience a few foot kicks to the mouth, and even an abdominal punch here and there but it's fine, that's what moms are, right? Punching bags for everything!
After the pitter patter subsides I listen to the tick tock in my head.
Sometimes I cannot fall asleep again.
I listen softly to Lyla's breaths and Jason's breaths in unison.
They both lay sprawled on the bed with their heads turned to the same side.
A slight snore emits from both of them.
Like father, like daughter.
I think way too much at this time.
I can't wait to have Jason's tests be cleared.
November 28th can't come soon enough. I just want my old life back. No more worry, no fear, just simple snuggles and snoring. Tick tock.... I wish time would fly.
